• IdiotTheWise

Covid Crooner - lyrics in progress

Updated: Sep 11, 2021

Words in progress minus a finished chorus as yet. I've got the chords, the riff, the melody and structure. For a guy that only knows four or five chords and has a voice like an angle grinder, it's an achievement, of sorts. Not for my neighbours maybe 😬.

Do I record myself and post it up? Is it ethical to do that to an already suffering planet? Probably not.

I'm going to illustrate this concept too. I have images in my head.


Covid Crooner

Kicking my doors in

She was almost welcome

A real suprise

Almost a treat

She looked drop dead

Hellishly hot

And then some

So deadly

So damned sweet

A vision to behold so seldom

I grinned and I winked

I violently cursed

I told her I love her

I told her I hate her

Leave me alone

Go away

She likes it turse

Within a heartbeat

I begged her to stay


Please don't leave

Please don't go

I kicked her my favourite seat

For better or worse

She laughed and called me a useless fat cunt and told me she rarely gets a welcome so bitter so sweet

Hook line and sinker

I thought she fell my stunt

But it turned out nope

I shoulda known

Utter deceit

Through thin lips tightly pursed 'n' gritted tabacco black teeth

Her dishonesty beggars belief

She bought me so much love

So much joy

Even hope

All wrapped around razor blades and right wing grief

I told her I’ve been waiting for so fucking long

Where have you been?

I thought you forgot me

I thought you were keen?

She furiously ranted

Mate you barley fucking blinked and I'm fucking busy

I'm a sneaky thief

You know what I mean?

Don't take me for granted

But I'm here now she seductively wheezed and puffed and purred and panted

She made my stopped heart stir

I just couldn't think

I felt like I had waited so very long

An eternity

Eternal lure

I am not infinite

I almost couldn’t wait for her anymore

Because I need my end to be nigh That much is for sure

She consoled my soul and sang cruel song

Inspid covid black words in no human tongue

All anxious scratches and menacing caws

A gruesome avian sonic attack

Sounds and meaning she could never take back

It was like nothing you've ever before saw or heard

So hideous

So wrong

Cadence Empty

Empathy Cold

Anger plenty

Theatrical gold

Raging and weeping

Errotic and flirting

She protested she could not comprehend why I did not call her

Why was I not louder?

Why not sooner?

To stop the hurting

How could I be so fucking wicked she giggled like a child?

What was the meaning she crocodile tear cried?

Lies lies lies.

She asked a thousand leading questions

I knew she was plotting

I knew she teasing

Fatal attraction

Sexual tension

Chaotic reasoning

I said: Death, I’ll tell you the rumor

I’m not one to reach out for a friend But now you're here

I have needs

Desite your deeds

Take me away and we can pretend

This is about healing

And the you can leave me again

Reeling and seething

That tease that she, death, can be

Again we did not journey

Again she did not choose me

Out of spite perhaps

That wicked covid crooner

She promised to return for me with menace in her shreaks and the sound of her dishonest bones as they clicked and creaked

She'll be back

Only sooner


Yeah, work in progress. Edits to happen, chorus to be decided. A bitter little story.


(copyright Mark Cummins 2021)

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